Grief affects us at a cellular level, and while it will come to us all, we are often ill-prepared to navigate loss. One way I’ve found to better cope with loss and grief is to learn to 'die a little' every day. This is not a physical death but a letting go — a death of ego, judgement, the need to be right, and clinging to specific outcomes. As you learn to die a little every day, you open yourself to living much more fully. Here’s what I’ve learnt helps me, and I hope it helps you:
- It’s okay to be sad and to hurt, so don’t bypass the feelings.
- There is no timeline for grief or pain, so go at your own pace.
- When grief makes way for joy, claim it and don’t feel guilty.
- Cherish your skin and mind with thoughtful wellness practices and products.
- As much as possible, stay present rather than projecting into how you’ll cope tomorrow.
If you want to help a grieving friend or family member, the best thing you can do is simply listen. Ask how they’re doing in the moment, and give them space to speak or just be — don’t try to make it right. Your presence alone is a huge support. If you can take some chores off their hands, do that. When everyone else has moved on, remember to call or send a card on key dates, no matter how far into the future. If you end up saying something wrong, forgive yourself and try again tomorrow. Let go of what’s past and just be.